I'm experiencing a mental meltdown. For the first time in a year, I don't feel like running. I don't have any injury to speak of. I just feel like I'm stuck. With 6 weeks to go before the Toronto marathon, every workout is harder than the previous one. Tempo runs that last forever. Intervals from hell. Long runs that trash my legs for days. Every workout seems to prove that I'm not ready. I find myself wondering if I can do this at my target pace (7:57/mi). One side of me thinks I should race at a slower pace on race day and enjoy the race. The other side thinks that after all this friggin training, I should go for it and that anyway, you can't really "enjoy" a 42k run.
I think that one reason for this moment of weakness is the end of the Triathlon season. No tri until next year. I'll keep racing road races though but no more splash-mash-and-dash. I guess one identifies with the sport and feels less complete when facing a 9 months void until the next race.
My two next races are long fuckers. On September 28, I have the Scotia Waterfront Half Marathon and three weeks later, on October 19, the Toronto Marathon. I know this is going to hurt. I could just go slow, but then, why train so hard?
I'm definitely nervous about the Marathon. I'm worried about nutrition and glycogen depletion. I've never experienced it. I've been tired though, like at the end of Olympic tris and if it's worse than that then I'm definitely not looking forward to it.
So I'm down. I shall overcome, if I survive today's 10k tempo run at half-marathon pace. Is that supposed to be fun? Jeeeez!