Today during my quality training, a thought poped in my head, similar to the one that popped in the president's head in "The Fifth Element":
"I have a doubt."
Didn't last long. But for a short while sometimes, our puzzler skips a beat and we lose our focus. Tim Noakes would probably say that our "Director" is trying to make us stop. The kind of doubts I refer to are not necessariliy "why do I run" but rather "why train so friggin' hard". Some will look at my training lo on Buckeye Outdoors and laugh. Well, its hard for me!
The thing is, I don't really have an answer. I just know that at this point in my life, I need to push myself physically further than I've ever done before. I've pushed mentally at work all my working life. Now I want to do this for myself.
I ran my best race ever about 10 days ago. I'm not just talking about my time, I'm talking about how the race felt. I pushed as hard as I could, but smartly. I ran negative splits. And at the end, I had nothing left.
It felt so great that when I play my race in my head, I want to BE there, live it again. Feel my breath move air in and out my chest. Feel the energy run through me like fire burning in my veins. Feel my heart beating as fast as I dare demand of it. To feel my body and mind, as one, accomplish even more than what I had hoped.
People ask me why I race. I can't really explain it to them. They will read the previous paragraph and feel nothing. We runners know better. You, my fellow runners, understand. You felt it as you read it. The feelings that come to us are so strong as to overcome our sense of now and transport us back in that race.
So why train hard?
Because I want more of it. This year
I want to complete my 3 training programs this year.
I want to run a 10k so fast that I won't believe my time.
I want to run the World Wide half this fall.
I want to run a marathon in Sedona in February 2009.
I want to keep on runnin'
See you on the road.
Around the Bay, Beer and Running, Sad news
8 years ago
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